well, yes, i guess…as long as the toddler permits it. this morning should do fine, as i am up FAR earlier than i typically am, and she is nestled in her bed. (feet to the pillow, i might add…just one of her nightly migrational habits that make us fear the implications of transitioning her to a big-girl bed.)
i can explain my early rising by telling you that i have so much going on in my head these days, that i am amazed i get to sleep at all without a shot of horse tranquilizer to my haunches every night. shall i try to list them for you? most tangible and nearest in the horizon first:
1. craft fair preparation. i was accepted to my first ‘real’ holiday craft boutique a couple of weeks ago. (there were more applicants than spaces, mind you, so i feel somewhat accomplished already.) the event takes place on december 8, and, having never tackled something of this dimension, i am finding myself a little adrift. it does not help in the slightest that i am a perfectionist, and have such delusions of grandeur that i picture in my mind the following scenario: upon seeing the glory of my setup and branding prowess, no one will believe that this is my first time doing it. one of the pitfalls of being a perfectionist, at least in my case, is that i also tend to procrastinate. which is, i suppose, a blog topic all its own.
2. domesticity. i struggle with it. and every time i square up to tackle it, i end up a little overwhelmed. being a planner is not something that comes easy to me. see number 1.
3. motherhood. i have a toddler. i could stop there, and a whole multitude of women would bow their heads in solemn solidarity. but i am thinking of having another one. the journey from point a to point b is fraught with a plethora of stumbling blocks. one of which, being my weight. i have been making some solid inroads toward this goal, but it is time to step up my game. i am aware of this. a second, finances. we are pretty much a one income family, though i am trying my darndest to make this jewelry thing a winner. amongst the many others, the most gut-wrenching (quite literally, i can assure you) obstacle to subsequent procreation is the haunting memory of my first pregnancy, in which you watched me become a shell of a person who spit excess saliva into a cup all day long and puked every night. seriously…do you really want to see what happens when you throw a toddler into the mix? i shudder just thinking about it. yet, i can’t seem to help myself. i am twisted like that.
which brings me to the present, wherein i am nursing a cup of coffee in the growing daylight, and trying to sort through some of this madness. time to pour another cup.